One of the Worst Things You've Ever Seen

No, it's not Madonna at the Super Bowl, it's the merciful conclusion of "Elvira: Mistriss of the Dark", her breakthrough film from Roger Corman productions. Last time I witnessed this abomination was when I was 19, and far less discriminating, because I wasn't nearly as appalled as I am right now. 

I was still a soldier in Germany, and had rented it on VHS from a place in town. I shuttled the precious tape 25 miles to the barracks on the army bus, and watched it that evening with my roommate and three other black dudes. They all thought it was excellent that she was rapping, as if she were giving their musical interest some kind of validity, when, really, she was exploiting it (and arguably helping to destroy it) in a sad effort to remain relevant.

Anyway, more of a side note, I never liked Elvira and her obnoxious bimbo valley girl schtick. She lacked the sinister, demure vibe of Vampira (who rightfully sued Elvira for stealing her look, and wrongfully lost) and her writing / performing partner John Paragon was one of the most unfunny comedians to ever make a buck. She degraded America's culturally rich horror host tradition. The 80's were indeed terrible.

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